Girl Math ©vectorfusionart/stock.adobe.com
There is no force in the world more powerful than girl math, and we women know exactly what the phrase “girl math” refers to. Girl math is a way to justify spending by breaking down expensive items into “cost per wear.”
It also rationalizes that using cash, as opposed to a debit or credit card, is “free.” Listen, if this all sounds like nonsense right now, then you need to read this article. Let the warm glow of girl math surround you—you might feel inclined to start practicing it yourself.
1. Going to See the Chicks This Wednesday. Had a Venmo Balance So it Was Free
Girl Math: Venmo balances mean free money
Source: TweetsbyLuke/Twitter
@TweetsByLuke laid out another staple of girl math—the idea that existing Venmo and CashApp balances equate to free money. Again, remember: if the number in your bank account doesn’t drop, you didn’t spend anything.
Going to See the Chicks This Wednesday. Had a Venmo Balance So it Was Free @TweetsByLuke/Twitter
Luke was headed to see the Chicks, and he got his tickets to the performance by paying with his Venmo balance. Hence, the tickets were free. Luke finished off his tweet by using #GirlMath and a picture of Carrie Underwood raising her arms in praise.
2. Stimulating the Economy, One Girl Math at a Time
Girl Math: Girl math boosts consumer spending, which helps grow the economy
Source: @jazzybaby99
“Oh my God, sis, I have figured it out,” said @jazzybaby99 in her TikTok video. The TikToker made a pretty good point about spending, pointing out that we all need to be grateful for girl math, as it helps boost the economy.
Stimulating the Economy, One Girl Math at a Time @jazzybaby99/TikTok
You don’t have to be some talking head on Fox or CNN to know that consumer spending boosts the economy. And what is girl math, if not a way to justify and increase customer spending? Everybody wins!
3. It’s Not a Big Purchase If You Buy it All Separately
Girl Math: Buying separately means no big number goes out of your bank account
Source: @maiaperdido/Twitter
What do you consider a big purchase? That number varies for everyone, and it’s all based on your personal comfort level when it comes to finances. That said, a big purchase really isn’t that big when it is broken down.
It’s Not a Big Purchase If You Buy it All Separately @maiaperdido/Twitter
If you buy things separately, there is no big purchase—it’s just a series of moderate-to-small purchases that add up. We can’t explain it, but this feels better when it comes to our bank accounts.
4. Everything on Your Starbucks Card Is Free
Girl Math: If it doesn’t come out of your bank account, it’s free
Source: @damndar
“If you top up your Starbucks card and [use it to pay] the next time, all your drinks are free.” Such was the logic used by @damndar, and it actually feels kind of true. Starbucks cards are a godsend to us coffee-and-pastry lovers.
Everything on Your Starbucks Card Is Free @damndar/TikTok
When you top up your Starbucks card, you’re adding money…money you won’t have to spend in the future. Future lattes won’t come out of your debit card, so, says girl math, they don’t technically count as actual spending.
5. Underwear Calculations
Girl Math: Packing double the number of underwear as your vacation days
Source: @leomi_anderson
One of the most common girl math is over packing when going on a vacation, especially when it comes to underwear. For reference, if a girl is going on a vacation for 7 days, it is absolutely pivotal for her to pack at least 14 pairs of underwear. Whether she is looking to change underwear twice a day or wear them periodically does not matter, because the logic all lies in the word “girl math.”
Underwear Calculations @leomi_anderson/TikTok
In fact, there isn’t much logic to this calculation. It is just something women all over the world do and are thus united by another of their mutual quirky habits.
6. $3,950 Earrings That Are Practically Free
Girl Math: Justifying expensive earrings down into cost-per-wear
Source: @chloeabeth4545
Chloe Liem, a content creator, blessed us all with some girl math to showcase why her Cartier earrings, which cost $3,950, were actually “free.” Basically, Chloe wanted a pair of Cartier earrings that originally cost $5,250.
$3,950 Earrings That Are Practically Free @chloeabeth4545 / TikTok
Though this may sound expensive, Cartier isn’t exactly a trinket you can find at Walmart. When Chloe chose a cheaper set, she cut $1,300 from the price. She also had $1,000 in vouchers, so she had to only fork over just under $3,000. According to Liem, if she wears the earrings every single day for the next four years, they’ll only cost a buck apiece, justifying this big ticket spending handily.
7. Saved £3.25 on My Shopping So Technically This £5.50 Book Was Free
Girl Math: Filling out a budget with something else
Source: @angwroberts
Girl mathing doesn’t just have to be for big ticket items, as this tweet from Angela Roberts proves. Roberts is a reader, and, in addition to reading, she’s also a girl mathematician. She was able to get her Then She Was Gone thriller by Lisa Jewell for free, thanks to money saved on her shopping.
Saved £3.25 on My Shopping So Technically This £5.50 Book Was Free @angwroberts/Twitter
Roberts tweeted that she saved £3.25 on her “shopping,” so, technically, the £5.50 book was free. As Roberts was under budget, girl math states that she could afford to buy herself a little treat from the store. Remember that the next time you hit up Target.
8. New Occasion, New Outfit
Girl Math: Thinking that you need a new outfit for every occasion
Source: @melvaz22
If there is one thing girl math goes vehemently against, it is accepting the fact that a woman has just “too many” clothes. You can never have “too many” clothes, especially when there is a celebrated event coming up that calls for you to go shopping with your girl pals, have some fraps, and spend the evening trying on pretty dresses and clicking Instagramable pictures.
New Occasion, New Outfit @melvaz22/TikTok
The number of outfits you may already have in your closet has no role to play in deciding to buy a new one for an upcoming event because an event also becomes special when you attend it wearing occasion-appropriate, shiny new clothes and accessories.
9. If Sephora Has a Sale and I Don’t Buy, I’m Losing Money
Girl Math: Sales always save money
Source: @iamsashakae/Twitter
On Twitter (actually, X, as it is known now), @iamsashakae shared her take on girl math, discussing exactly how you can save money with this approach. For example, Sasha said, if Sephora has a sale, she has to go.
If Sephora Has a Sale and I Don’t Buy, I’m Losing Money @Sephora/Facebook | @iamsashakae/Twitter
Why? Because, “If Sephora has a 20% off sale, I am losing money if I don’t buy what I need at that time.” It’s true—if you don’t go when a store like Sephora or Ulta has a sale, you’ll just have to buy the items at a more expensive price later.
10. “I Spent it on My Vessel”
Girl Math: Necessities don’t count
Source: @annatempleton___
“I don’t spend it on me, I spend it on my vessel.” We absolutely love that purchase-justifying language, which we got from @annatempleton___ on TikTok. Templeton gave us all a rundown on what girl math is, and it makes a lot of sense.
“I Spent it on My Vessel” @annatempleton___/TikTok
Your “vessel” can refer to a lot of things, such as your house, car, bike, or whatever else. You need to spend money on those things, so it’s not like you’re hitting up Shein or buying a bunch of stuff on Amazon. Buying necessities doesn’t really count as spending money.
11. Going on Vacation to Lose Friends
Girl Math: Coming back from vacation with less friends than you had before going
Source: @shinathagoat
If you are a girl who has vacationed with a bunch of your girlfriends and shared a room with them for several days, you must be thoroughly aware of what we are talking about. The energy and vibes when going on a trip are absolutely unmatched, but they take a drastic 180-degree turn during the last days of the trip.
Going On Vacation To Lose Friends @shinathagoat/TikTok
The pressure of living together and doing everything you can during your few free days is just too much and can lead to clashes, snaps, and girl fights, resulting in you coming back from vacation with a considerably reduced number of friends than you had before going. But then a day passes at home, and everything goes back to the way it was!
12. The CEO’s of Girl Math
Girl Math: Laying down the tenets of girl math
Source: @unfilteredfacetimes
On TikTok, @unfilteredfacetimes announced that they were the “CEOs of girl math,” laying down a list of tenets that we all needed to follow. For example, free shipping? Well, that just means you’re “saving money.”
The CEO’s of Girl Math @unfilteredfacetimes/TikTok
Of course, another tenet was to always round down, not up, while another stated that you could save money on gas by driving to a cheaper station. And so on and so forth. Laugh if you want to—girl math works for millions of people.